dejasenti

There's always flower petals on my windowsill. She puts them there cause she thinks they're real pretty and I want so badly to tell her that they're just dead segmented flowers but I don't say a damn word of it. It would make her feel old in the worst way. So I don't say a word and instead I'm a veteran that never wanted to fight in the first place, but now I've got this goddamn bad leg and i march when all i wanted to do is pace around a bit. When I need an excuse I only get up to walk and I've got one somewhere below where my spine once was. She is may and I am home from war at last. I march and I march and I march and she is always may. T

At five I always thought her voice was the sweetest. I'd ask her to sing me to sleep and she would tell me she couldn't sing, and I told her of course you can, you sing so sweet. And so she would sing and I would sleep and then I'd grow and hear her voice again and know that she would never really sound as sweet to me as she did back then. Every memory I have of her is in black and white and gray most of all. Black lashes and white elbows and gray everywhere in between. Five years from now I won't be as scared of girls in coffee shops. They stare and I look down and eat my fucking muffin because I don't know what else to do and I'm wearing t

Dearest Charles, How are you? Uncle Hank has been acting all funny again lately, and I'm afraid that I just can't understand him the way that you used to. Christ, I don't rightly know how a man gets to the point where he's compelled to do such things, and I'd encourage you to enlighten me if you have so much as a hint of insight on the matter. He walked into the kitchen when I was at the stove, and mind you, he did not care to dole out a hello or even a glance in the vicinity of my location, which subsequently lead me to endure a terrifying three seconds of time in which I highly doubted my physical existence in that very kitchen. Although y

The problem was, nobody knew who he was. He just walked up from the street with a bottle in one hand and a nickel in the other and asked if anybody, "anybody at all," had change for a nickel. He wasn't well dressed, to be frank. He had an old cap and an old jacket that might have been a nice sports jacket around 20 years ago. It made me wonder why they were called sports jackets in the first place if you never really played sports in them anyway. I guess I was thinking that right about when he reached the driveway and walked right up to us. It was just my brothers and I, until he decided to hobble on over, and it was particularly frightening

She bled like summer and clotted like winter and god if I could pull my hair out like her. Last September she told me that her father says she talks in tidal waves but she's never seen the ocean and all she can do is laugh and laugh. (All I could do was swallow and swallow and its the fucking rip tide that I blame.)  She walked around the room like someone who didn't have any certain place to go but would rather not pass up the chance to prove that she knew how to really pace around a room. (And she did, she really did.) In April she told me that she'd wed after a rainstorm when the air smelt like worms. (She was the type to admit

But maybe if i spent my whole life dismantling birdcages or rolling my tongue out on the floor so you could have a red carpet to dance on, then maybe you might care to mount my fucking head on a wall or something once i'm really dead. maybe if i build castles for the seagulls they'd teach me how to fly. well you'd think that if i spent seventeen years playing hide and seek with my imaginary friend jesus christ that he might try and save me. (he's a terrific fucking hider and i'm a real disillusioned seeker, if you'd really like to know the truth.) but its got to be a crime to feel so good.